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Category: My Messy Life

Poison Ivy, Bird Poo, and Bitterness

You know that bitter old lady? The one who is never happy. The one who finds the dark lining in silver clouds? If you tell her to have a nice day, she will scowl at you and say “not likely”? The one who can tell you about every wrong that has ever been done to her but doesn’t thank you for mowing her yard? She has a good life but she can’t enjoy it because she is so focused on what people have done to her. She obsesses on her failures and doesn’t know how to celebrate her victories. Her husband is beat down and has given up trying to please her because nothing he does will ever make up for what he didn’t do. I’m sure you know that lady, because I’m that lady! Wait?! What?! No, you’re not!   When I tell people about my struggles with bitterness, they seldom believe me. Thankfully, no one sees me as that bitter old lady, but deep down, without Jesus, that is exactly who I am: My hubby and I recently ventured into the world of pre-marital counseling.  We often have couples coming to us for advice. I think this is because my husband and I sincerely love each other, have a lot of fun, AND we have the two most opposite personalities on the planet.** In the work book, we are using for counseling, one of the first activities is to read 1 Corinthians 13:4-6 (Love is patient. Love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.) As you read the passage, you are supposed to identify which aspect of love you struggle with the most. For me, there is no question: love keeps no record of wrongs. Something in me, and it’s obviously NOT LOVE, is a great recorder of wrongs. I can still remember the snarky comment one of my friends made about my favorite sundress when I was in the first grade!!! (I’m 47…that was a few years ago.) I remember the argument my hubby and I…